Weekends were brutal.
Sometimes I would go into my apartment after work on Friday evening and not come out until Sunday. Having talked to no one. Having seen no one. Then I would go to church and even though I talked to a few people it didn’t make a difference. My lips moved but my soul still ached. I knew that in a few short minutes in would be over. I’d be back in my apartment again – alone.
Nothing reminds you that you’re single like weekends do.
After I moved inside the city (before I lived outside of Atlanta), I became more involved at church, and my community grew. There were less desperately lonely moments, but they never went away totally.
No matter how big your social circle there are going to be lonely times when you’re single. The choice is whether you fall into them or resent them. I pray you fall into them.
How to Fall into Your Loneliness
First, accept the inevitable. You are going to be lonely sometimes. Instead of fight it, determine to expect God’s faithfulness to show up. Loneliness is your opportunity to take in the living water that Jesus promises. The same living water He promised the Samaritan woman at the well. Do you remember the story?
A Samaritan woman came to draw water from a well where Jesus was sitting. She came in the middle of the day, alone, because she was an outcast in her society. She was unmarried but had been married to several different men and was living with a man at that time. Her unstable relationships are evidence of the depth of her loneliness. She sought after men, held onto men, hoping they would quench her thirst for companionship and worth.
Then Jesus spoke to her. He said, ““Will you give me a drink?” (John 4:7). Essentially He asked her if she would trust Him. But the Samaritan woman gave Him an excuse. And He responded, “If you knew the gift of God and who it is that asks you for a drink, you would have asked him and he would have given you living water” (John 4:10). So she questioned Him some more. But Jesus doesn’t let her go. He says, “Everyone who drinks this water will be thirsty again, but whoever drinks the water I give them will never thirst. Indeed, the water I give them will become in them a spring of water welling up to eternal life” (John 4:13-14).
Like He promised the Samaritan woman, Jesus promises us living water that will quench all of our thirst – including our loneliness. Yes, the ultimate thirst quencher is eternal life in Heaven. However, Jesus’s living water is available to us before then. It’s available to us now. We just have to accept His invitation to it.
So the only question that remains is do you trust Him? Do you truly believe that Jesus can take away your loneliness? Do you truly believe that you can be satisfied in Him?
If so, then you have learned to fall into your loneliness.
This does not mean that you no longer wish you had a boyfriend or husband. You can have unmet desires and still experience God’s peace. The Samaritan woman’s circumstances did not change immediately, however, she went away knowing her Savior intimately.
I pray that this weekend you fall into your loneliness by accepting the living water that Jesus is offering you. In order to keep your mind steadfast on truth, here are 16 Bible verses for when you’re lonely:
“Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.” Isaiah 41:10
“Casting all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you.” 1 Peter 5:7
“No man shall be able to stand before you all the days of your life. Just as I was with Moses, so I will be with you. I will not leave you or forsake you.” Joshua 1:5
“Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me.” Psalm 23:4
“Be strong and courageous. Do not fear or be in dread of them, for it is the Lord your God who goes with you. He will not leave you or forsake you.” Deuteronomy 31:6
“Teaching them to observe all that I have commanded you. And behold, I am with you always, to the end of the age.” Matthew 28:20
“Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or danger, or sword? As it is written, “For your sake we are being killed all the day long; we are regarded as sheep to be slaughtered.” No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.” Romans 8:35-39
“O Lord, all my longing is before you; my sighing is not hidden from you.” Psalm 38:9
“Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” Philippians 4:6-7
“By this we know that we abide in him and he in us, because he has given us of his Spirit.” 1 John 4:13
“Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.” James 4:7
“A Song of Ascents. I lift up my eyes to the hills. From where does my help come? My help comes from the Lord, who made heaven and earth.” Psalm 121:1-2
“Trust in him at all times, O people; pour out your heart before him; God is a refuge for us. Selah” Psalm 62:8
“Have you not known? Have you not heard? The Lord is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. He does not faint or grow weary; his understanding is unsearchable. He gives power to the faint, and to him who has no might he increases strength. Even youths shall faint and be weary, and young men shall fall exhausted; but they who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint.” Isaiah 40:28-31
“Surely he has borne our griefs and carried our sorrows; yet we esteemed him stricken, smitten by God, and afflicted. But he was wounded for our transgressions; he was crushed for our iniquities; upon him was the chastisement that brought us peace, and with his stripes we are healed. All we like sheep have gone astray; we have turned—every one—to his own way; and the Lord has laid on him the iniquity of us all.” Isaiah 53:4-6
“Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.” Matthew 11:28-29
Are weekends hard for you as a single woman?